A Life of Fear

Friends, we live our lives in fear.

That might be a very strong statement to make, especially in such general terms. Think for a moment about yourself, personally; how much fear do you have in your life? More and more, I see continuing evidence that proves that most people live in fear. The most obvious indicator to me is how hard people work to lobby the government to ban this or that. Ban cigarettes. Ban school buses that don't stop at railroad crossings. Ban the ability of taxpayers to save their retirement money as they see fit. Ban hot coffee that doesn't have a warning on the side of the cup. Ban children from sitting in the front seat of cars because of the airbags (which the government forced the automakers to install). Ban guns. In fact, what result is there from some event or situation that someone, somewhere feels was preventable? "There oughta be a law," they'll say firmly. We will ban anything and everything to feel safer. And the reason we DON'T feel safer, and we won't EVER feel safer, is fear. Fear that something bad will happen to us, or to someone we love.

Frankly, the fearful lives most humans lead today sickens me. Let's look at the facts: we're all human, meaning we're all mortal. Who among you REALLY wants to live on this planet forever? (I'm planning to live forever, but it certainly won't be on this plane of existence.) Also, you are not necessarily in control of the moment or method of your demise. That is in the hands of God; He alone knows when you're going to die.

So, whence the fear? Everyone on the earth knows that they're going to die someday. The key is, how do you handle that? Most people simply do what I've already said, and live their lives in fear of that unknown day in which the thread of their life is cut. But I believe there's a better way. Please note that this is not a diatribe against useless laws (or, not ONLY a diatribe against useless laws). I simply believe we depend far too much on others to protect us, to keep us safe when we need to be made safe. So many people who live in fear seem to believe that a few more cops on the street, a few more laws in the books, a few more regulations in the bylaws, a few more safety features in the car will keep them and their loved ones safe and secure. That's just not the case.

Another interesting thing to note about this point of view is how it forces others to change their behavior, rather than us changing our own behavior. So more laws are put into place to curtail the "bad" behavior of others, or to ban something that we consider dangerous that we see others possess. This is not a realistic view. If you've ever taken a defensive driving course, you know that it doesn't teach you the laws of the road and how they should be applied; those laws already aren't working, and that's the problem. The course will teach you how to better protect yourself on the road from others who break the law.

Let me present a hypothetical situation. One fine evening, I'm walking down the street. As I'm walking along, a man steps from the shadows, draws a pistol from his belt, and points it at my head. He demands something from me (what he demands really isn't important). I do not have what he demands, and even if I did, I'm really not that interested in giving it to him, anyway.

So what are my options here?

1. If I do indeed have what he wants, I can just give it to him and hope he goes away.
2. I could also just tell him "no" and see what happens.
3. I could attempt to grab his weapon and wrest it from him.
4. I could draw my own weapon (if I have one) and shoot it out.
5. I could use martial arts techniques (if I know any) to disable him.
   
6. I could give him what he wants, then as he turns away, draw my weapon, shoot him, take back what he took, and leave.
7. I could attempt to talk him out of taking what I have.
8. I could do what Jesus suggests and not only give him what he wants, but the clothes off my back, as well. (See Matthew 5:38-42 for the basic idea as He expressed it.)
   

Basically, I have options, and lots of them. It's critical to note, however, just who all of the options depend on: ME. I decide what option to take here. There are laws against what this man is doing, but how are they helping me in the above situation? There are police who's job is to protect me and stop guys like this, but I can't depend on the police to just show up. I can't depend on my parents or friends or relatives or even a Good Samaritan stranger to materialize from nowhere and help me run the guy off. I can't even expect God to send a bunch of angels down from Heaven to disable the guy or strike him dead. While it's possible that any of these things could happen, I can't plan for them to happen. All of these people (or beings) would indeed want to help me, but if they don't know my peril or aren't nearby when it happens, there is nothing they can do. I have exactly one being in the universe I can depend on in the above situation, and that is me. If you depend on others, they might not always be available to help you when you need them. Everyone over the age of 12 has a somewhat complicated life and just can't be available for you 100% of the time.

So here's how I mitigate the risk of living. First and foremost, I understand that I and I alone am ultimately responsible for my own safety. When the moment of truth comes, I doubt there will be anyone who is able to protect me. Second, I'm a fighter. I will not simply accede to the demands of a criminal who wants my wallet. It's a principle thing to me; what would happen if everyone just gave criminals what they want? And when you do give them what they want, how often do you get whatever it is back in any condition worth having? "You could die...are your possessions worth your life?" (The criminals are already depending on me to espouse that philosophy.) Well, first, I'm a Christian, so again, I'm planning on living forever, just not here. If the guy kills me, what's the big deal? I'm just headed for the eternal bliss of closer to God's presence. Second, I have a very large life insurance policy, so my children will be well-provided for. Yes, my death will be painful for anyone who cares about me, but will it be any easier on them for me to die now or later? Third, I plan ahead. There's a reason why the Boy Scout motto is "be prepared." It's common sense that you'll do much better if you're prepared for a specific situation than if you're not. I know it's not possible to plan for every contingency, but I can sure do the best I can.

I am a big believer in the carrying of concealed weapons, and it is my intention to get a permit and carry one myself when I'm financially able to handle the fees and filings. I also intend to study more martial arts (a financial consideration, as well as a scheduling consideration). When I'm driving, I work hard to pay attention to what's going on around me and to not be distracted. I anticipate what other drivers are going to do and I look for escape routes out of bad situations that might arise. When in shady situations, I pay close attention to my surroundings and to what's happening around me. In my security work, I try to plan as much as possible for as many things as possible. I research attacks. I search out the vulnerabilities of my assets. I look for defense strategies. I ramp up for incidents. Basically, my whole life is like this; I research and learn and plan, then repeat. With my finances, I use Quicken and spreadsheets to determine where I am and where I should be. I anticipate as many expenses as possible so that I can cover everything I need. I plan for savings and investments.

There will always be fear. Everyone lives with fear, but no one should live IN fear. It is essential to know how to handle fear in a constructive manner. I use knowledge, planning, and faith to bring the light that chases the shadows of fear away. Once you learn to handle your fear, you will be unstoppable; no decision will be too difficult to make, no obstacle to challenging to overcome, no goal too far away to reach.