What an amazing week this has been, and what an incredible weekend this is already looking to be. Here we are, approaching the big July 4th weekend, in my opinion the one holiday that really does represent what is greatest about our country. Every July 4th we take time to celebrate the wondrousness of our country, our great history, and the beauty of summertime. We shoot fireworks; a cherished tradition, even if it has been under attack the last several years by those who seem to believe that we can all live in bubbles and protect ourselves and our children from every conceivable danger. We cook out, eating lots of very unhealthy meats in the hot sun. We swim, we boat, we climb, we drive, we do all sorts of excellent holiday activities...basically, we play. Since 9/11, that date has come to mean mourning for the dead, and grim determination and unity for our country against the forces of evil that would seek to destroy us. July 4th, on the other hand, is the anti-9/11...it is on this day that we truly celebrate the most recognized line in the Declaration of Independence, "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness", in all the meanings those words hold for us.
And yet already we have turbulent beginning for this weekend, for me personally as well as for the country. My girlfriend Heidi was in a bad accident last night; she was rear-ended in her PT Cruiser by a large Chevy SUV driven by an 18-year-old who wasn't paying close enough attention to what he was doing. Neither her nor her son's situations are life-threatening, but as with any accident, there are insurance companies to deal with, physical health concerns to monitor, auto repair shops to talk to, and time and energy lost overall in dealing with the mess caused by this gentleman's split-second of inattention. (It always strikes me how unpredictable life is...there are mistakes you can make over and over again, even serious and life-threatening ones, that you can get away with sans serious consequences, yet there are other serious and not-so-serious mistakes that, if you make even once, your life is changed forever. The hand of God in all things.) I'm just happy, and I raise my voice to God in thanks, that neither she nor her son were seriously injured in the accident, because as I just mentioned, some mistakes have life-altering qualities.
My week really started on Sunday, when I rededicated my life to Christ. I had been feeling the Holy Spirit's pull the last several weeks, knowing I had begun to stray too far from the soothing voice and care of the Great Shepherd, and He used his hook to pull me back into the fold, where I truly am better off. I had gone to church on Sunday morning, for the first time in quite a few weeks. Our postulant, Luke Dean (i.e., layman in preparation and initial training for holy orders) gave the sermon, and it was a great one on the nature of the Holy Spirit and what the Holy Spirit does for us in our lives. It was truly inspiring to hear his sermon, and I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me so gently again. Once his sermon was complete, we began the sacramental rite and as I waited for my turn to head for the communion rail, I again felt the Holy Spirit whispering gently to my soul. I began to pray, asking God to bring me back to Him, because I know I need him in my life, so very badly. My nothingness, my sin, my insignificance in His wondrous universe, he and I conversed about these, partially with words and partially with feelings, and soon I felt something wet drop onto my folded hands. I was weeping...weeping at knowing how my heart yearned for God's presence, at how I need the Holy Spirit in my life in a real and constant way. Feeling that for the first time in a long time really helped bring me to a good place again. I am again secure in my relationship with God, and I will work so hard not to turn from it (and I have a LONG way to go there).
My week continued, and I was very busy the entire time. I had a tremendous roller-coaster day yesterday, with a very enlightening realization of my actual authority in my current job. We're reworking our internal access permissions for our entire company, and we're focusing on individual employees' job titles, departments, programs, and supervisory functions so we can put together a role-based system for handling these. While doing some work for this project, I looked at our org chart and realized, "I report direct to a VP-level person, our Chief Architect...that makes me...a DIRECTOR-LEVEL MANAGER!!!" This new realization came to a head yesterday when I was able to use that authority, that access to my VP-level boss, to stop some things that were happening in the background here and shouldn't have been. The realization and fresh exercise of my authority opened my eyes to why I have felt the weight of responsibility on my shoulders increasing so dramatically in the last several weeks. It was exciting, but very sobering, as well...it had a quality the Romans used to refer to as "gravitas", loosely translated to "moral or emotional heaviness or significance". I've been in jobs where I had responsibility but no authority, or lower levels of authority and responsibility, but when I see how it had grown with my even realizing it...well, let's just say it made me feel very good and yet very serious.
Now to turbulence for our country. The first woman appointed to the Supreme Court, Sandra Day O'Connor, retired today. Now begins the huge fight in the Senate as Democrats obstruct another Bush appointee (and I'm sure that, whoever Bush puts forward will be heavily scrutinized and attacked). My prediction is simply this; the so-called "nuclear option" the Republicans have been threatening for some time will now come to pass, and much sooner than anyone expected. The Democrats have already been rattling the saber loudly since President Bush's speech a few days ago on the status of the war in Iraq. They've been spoiling for a new fight, and now that have one. This will not be a pleasant time, I'm afraid.
Brian Lundmark, the author of one of my favorite comics, Rockwood, lost his father to cancer last night. Not only is Brian a talented comic artist, he is also a Sooner, so I am particularly saddened by his loss. If you get a moment, you might go to his site and just drop him a note of condolence.
Thus begins a festive and turbulent holiday weekend. I hope yours stays steady and fun. Oh, and remember to thank God for the fact that He brought you into the world as a citizen of this wonderful country...He had as much a hand in the whole thing as any human did. Thanks for reading along today.
No comments:
Post a Comment