From the "Wacky San Francisco" file (hey, the columnist even says that himself):
C.W. Nevius: Support for supervised drug injection is growing
Go ahead and make the case, dude. I can't believe I actually visited there. After all, they recently refused to let the Marines film a recruitment commercial there, and it's widely known that they would run all military recruiters out of the city limits if they could (Berkeley has pretty much already done so). Finally, San Francisco is one of America's most notorious sanctuary cities. So, in honor of their wackiness, their refusal to obey the laws of the United States, and their disdain for the protection of their wackiness afforded by the government and military that they so despise, I suggest a new Pledge of Allegiance:
I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation under God, excluding San Francisco, with liberty and justice for all.Works well, don't you think? It's not really "indivisible" any more, I'm afraid, so we might as well accept that and run with it.
Moving right along...from the "Liberals are only a blown fuse away from the conspiracy nutters who think the government staged the Moon landing at Area 51" file:
It starts here, with "Randi Rhodes is the Victim of a Violent Attack." Then it moves to here to prove the lunacy: "Air America host Randi Rhodes wasn't mugged."
OK, forget the fact that Air America radio sucks and that very few people, even liberals, actually listen to it. Conservative talk radio has substantially higher ratings, probably by a few orders of magnitude. Forget that I, as a regular listener of conservative talk radio, had never even heard of Randi Rhodes before, though most of the world (and especially the moonbats) know exactly who the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Mark Levin, Ann Coulter, Laura Ingraham, Dennis Miller, and G. Gordon Liddy are. Let's face facts: if Ms. Rhodes had actually ever said or done anything noteworthy, Rush, Sean, Mark, Ann, Laura, Dennis, or G. Gordon would've mentioned the name before, I guarantee it. Forget that Ms. Rhodes lives and works in New York City where, despite decreased crime thanks to Mr. Giuliani's efforts and programs, still routinely has muggings, murders, and burglaries that are completely unrelated to a resident's political views or occupation as a liberal talk radio host.
And yet, as soon as word leaks out, every moonbat on the planet is ready to blame it yet again on the "Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy" (VRWC). The same VRWC, headed by George W. Bush and Dick Cheney, that has done everything from directly causing global warming to having JFK assassinated to planting Monica Lewinsky in Bill Clinton's office to seduce him with a cigar and a blue dress. Every conservative is part of the VRWC, of course, and we all want nothing more than for every liberal to be violently wiped from the earth by God's wrath. They talk an awful lot about hate, but I think situations like this show where the hate really comes from.
Next up, the "Striking a Blow Against Pedophilia" file:
Suspected Toddler Rape Fugitive Arrested
I'm thrilled to see this. This is the guy who created that tape showing himself sexually assaulting a three-year-old girl. The tape was "recently" discovered outside of Las Vegas. This guy says he's "tired of running." I bet here in a few months he'll also be tired of prison food and being beaten and anally raped daily by other inmates. Since we don't get the death penalty for these characters, I suppose we must be happy with what we get.
Now for the "Really Wonderful News" file:
Having sex daily 'improves a man's fertility'
It turns out sex is more like weightlifting. The more you do it, the more you build yourself up. As if man needed another reason to have lots of sex. On the other hand, there's always one of my favorite quotes from Billy Crystal in City Slickers:
Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
Finally, from the "College football fans really DO have a sense of humor" file (and I recommend that only college football fans check this one out):
Stoops today: It's too early to worry about rankings
What really makes this one are the comments at the bottom of the article. Enjoy!
And speaking of college football (I already hear many of my readers sighing sadly), this season has done more to show that both college football and its fans can be completely crazy. I am happy, though, that OU still has a legitimate chance at playing for the NC, in spite of CU's freak upset. We still have quite a few nagging issues to take care of as soon as possible, though, like pass coverage in the middle and special teams.
On the whole CU issue, one of two things will happen and I'm good either way. First, CU will get beat by at least two more teams and likely end up in the Texas Bowl. (Enjoy that, CU fans...what a great way to show the progress you've made.) Second, CU could end up doing well in the Big 12 North and finish in the title game...for a rematch with OU. (Does lightning strike the same place twice? Uh, no. OU will still bear some anger from CU's "signature win" in Boulder, and on a neutral field, OU will beat the ever-living snot out of them by something like 45-7.)
Like I said, either way, I'm good. Thanks for reading along.
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