Being a Morning Person

"Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise." --Benjamin Franklin

Thanks so much, Ben. That statement has been ingrained in the American psyche for over 200 years now, and many of us still feel its pain. "Pain?" you ask (especially you morning people). Yes, pain...the pain of those of us who like to sleep in a bit, the pain of those of us who are night-owls, who work better later in the day than earlier, who work hard and sleep harder. It doesn't help that the concept of the prototypical American is still the farmer, the man who wakes up at 4:30 am to slop the hogs, milk the cows, and basically get 80% of his work done before breakfast. Again, this concept sears through every American, and cuts like a knife when you don't conform to it.

Think about how those of us who aren't "morning people" talk about it; we almost have to apologize every time we mention it. Also, think about how people use the term "night-owl". It's almost a pejorative term, as though staying up late is somehow bad for you and you can't POSSIBLY be a productive member of society. The stigma of being a late sleeper is one that is difficult to shake, and people WILL look down on you for it. It's funny to me how our society preaches tolerance and "live and let live", and how such things as heavy smoking, heavy drinking, and other nasty things are completely acceptable. But when it comes to oversleeping??? GOD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL, YOU FILTHY SINNER!!! Don't forget the resentment factor that plays in to so much of the petty games humans play: "I have to get up early, so by crackey, you're going to as well, or I'm going to make you feel miserable for not doing so."

Now that the venting is over, let's talk some facts. Nearly all doctors agree that it's best to get 8 hours of sleep. Everyone acknowledges that. However, very few people in America today, especially working parents and those who have very demanding jobs, are rarely able to meet that minimum requirement. Consider the other societal indicators that there are lots of people who stay up very late. McDonald's, Taco Bell, Wendy's, and most recently Burger King now advertise their late-night hours for their drive-thru windows. Wal-Mart and many supermarket chains stay open 24 hours a day. The need MUST be there, otherwise these businesses would not be wasting money keeping the lights on and keeping workers in the store or manning the drive-thru window at 3 am. So people are staying up later than they used to. Yet everyone seems pretty OK with that, as long as you get your sorry butt out of bed at 6:00 am like you should, you lazy idiot!!

I would argue that, if you can't find time to make your minimum sleep requirements, then your life is out of balance and only bad things can come of it. With all the concerns about cholesterol and high blood pressure and obesity and all these other serious health issues plaguing Americans today, sleeping patterns and the ill effects of undersleeping seem curiously left by the wayside. In fact, many of the "healthy lifestyle" people I know strangely leave sleep behind as part of their health plan...they get to bed at around 10:30-11 and drag their sleep-deprived bodies out of bed at 5 am so they can do their 20 miles on the mountain bike and still get to work by 7. Healthy? Sure, you keep telling yourself that.

The sad fact is that those of us who prefer to get a little extra sleep in the morning will continue to be looked down on by society in general until we conform.